The story begins with Charlie as a ten year old boy, participating in a game of spin the bottle with his friends. He spins the bottle and it lands on a Goth looking girl (who I guess is some sort of witch). She wants to have sex with Charlie, he resists her, and so she puts a hex on him. The girls hex results in every girl who becomes sexually involved with Charlie finding the man of their dreams afterwards and getting married. (It's a very intricate hex)

We fast forward to Charlie (Dane Cook) as a successful Dentist. He meets Cam Wexler, a penguin specialist, played with all the personality of wall paper, by the incredibly hot and surprisingly untalented Jessica Alba. They meet at a wedding for one of his ex-girlfriends.

The rumors of Charlie's hex start circulating, after many of his ex girlfriends find happiness and marriage right after their flings with him. Suddenly desperate sex pots come out of the wood work all wanting a piece of Charlie, in hopes to find "Mr. Right" afterwards.

Alba's character is a super klutz, when she's not busy looking completely gorgeous, she's in the middle of falling down, or bumping into something. It’s almost as if she has early symptoms of vertigo. At first it's amusing, but after twenty or thirty times of hitting her head, or falling down stairs, or accidentally hurting someone else, it becomes grating on ones nerves, almost to the point that you're actually hoping she's injured badly enough for the movie to end. In fact that's not a bad idea, when compared to the actual ending.

So, back to the cinematic masterpiece… blah, blah, blah, Charlie is unhappy, no one loves him. He falls for Cam, and they hook up. He fears the hex will work on her the same way it has on all the other women in his life, so he goes into full stalker mode on her. Trying to make sure she falls in love with him. This backfires, because Charlie is an idiot that creeps her out. Charlie’s clinginess forces Cam to dump him. Charlie becomes depressed, and needs reassurance, and help, in the form of his best friend and perverted sidekick Stu, played by Dan Fogler with viciously funny scene stealing ability. In fact Dan Fogler is someone to keep an eye on, because even in a pile of stupid, like this terrible travesty, he comes out shining, and that’s impressive. I predict many more perverted sidekick roles in his future, and that's not necessarily a bad thing.

Anyhow, more blah, blah, blah's, Charlie let's Cam go because the grown up witch girl who hexed him tells Charlie he should (don't ask). Then with prodding from his crazy sidekick, and his sidekick's three breasted lover (again, don't ask) Charlie rushes to catch Cam before she leaves to be with her beloved penguins in Antarctica. Luckily, everything turns out ok, and in the end they get together... Whew! Didn’t see that coming did you?

There are funny moments in this movie, but not nearly enough of them to dull the pain due to the scenes of sincerity between Alba and Cook. It seems as if both of them literally have never dramatically acted before.

Jessica Alba's expressions range from "smiling cutie", to "bummed out cutie". The same can be said for Dane Cook. Their dialogue in these scenes are just as brutal. "I love you, and that's hard for me to say." It's even harder for us to listen to.

Write Comment
Name:	Guest
Title:
Comment:
Code:*

Powered by AkoComment 2.0!