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12 steps to a cooler you Print E-mail
Written by ALAN SIMONIS   
Tuesday, 29 March 2005
I know, I know - why the hell should anyone take advice on how to be cool from a guy who writes movie reviews (for free!) on the Internet? Believe me dear reader, if I were in your shoes I would be skeptical as well; in a way it reminds me of all those old jokes about nuns teaching sex-ed classes.
However, being cool is a subject I’ve spent a great deal of time pondering over the years, and I think I’ve come up with a few pointers.  Keep in mind, this won’t be a story about what is cool, because quite frankly at this point just about anything can be cool. This is more of a guide to tell you how to take who you are, and make it cool. Let’s get started!


1. LEARN THE LINGO

In a sense, cool has always been best defined by the vocabulary it incorporates.  As a rule, the list of words and phrases that make up cool-speak are constantly changing to fit new times, places, people, and situations. Because of this, it can be pretty easy to fall out of date. For example, just as “groovy” was cool for the counterculture of the 60’s and “rad” and “gnarly” meant cool for skaters in the early 80’s, they seem outmoded now.  So, if you find yourself using phrases like “mellow out” or “tubular” on a regular basis, it might be time for a vocabulary overhaul.  Try “sweet” or “nice” for good, or “sketchy” for bad.  I’m kind of partial to “bitchin” myself.  Or try copping a line from a popular film like “Napoleon Dynamite” or the latest South Park episode.  If all else fails though, just use “cool.” cool is cool, cool will always be cool - cool is king.

2. UPDATE THE WARDROBE

It can be hard to change your habits when it comes to clothes. There is a part of me that would be content to dwell in the Grunge era of flannels and jeans until the end of existence. Unfortunately time marches on, and generally leaves a sea of discarded fashion in its wake. Take a gawk at your closet: do you see clothes you used to wear in high school?  Have you bought multiple versions of essentially the same outfit? Do you own stuff that is falling apart or just flat-out doesn’t fit anymore?  If you answered “yes” to any of the above questions, it may be time bag the stuff, give it to Goodwill, and hit the mall. While you’re there…

3. BUY A HAT

From Cowboy to Kangol, and Baseball to Beret, one of the simplest ways you can define your notion of cool is with a nice, easily identifiable piece of headwear. For certain subcultures of cool (particularly musicians), an outlandish hairstyle will accomplish the same goal.

4. FIX UP THE PAD

Unless you live in an apartment like I do, there is no excuse for living with personality-free bare white walls. Even the most style unconscious among us have at least a basic idea of what colors might look good together. If not, that’s what the guy at the paint store is there for. However, even for us living with a lease, there are ways to bring some cool into your crib. Everyone has the same basic furniture needs: sofas, tables, beds, chairs, shelving…  Why not pick up an interesting bookcase or coffee table?  Try to find accessories that match your interests, like movie posters for film buffs. The idea is to make your space personal; your environment should reflect the type of cool you want to convey.

5. BECOME A BLOCKBUSTER

The key word when it comes to movies is “eclectic.” Just as your place is a reflection of you, the same goes for everything in it, including your DVD rack. By learning to enjoy a wide range of movies, you’re telling the world that you’re well rounded and open-minded; both admirable qualities in the realm of cool. Be cautious not to go too far with any particular genre though – overload on sci-fi and you might look like a nerd. Overstocking action reads as macho jerk. Overdo the comedies and people might not take you seriously. And if you load up on romance or kids films you could come off as a wimp. There is a level of balance that you can achieve when you’re building a cool movie collection.  The same goes for when you want to…

6. SET THE MOOD WITH MUSIC

Perhaps no area of the entertainment world is as closely tied into the notion of cool as music. In fact, I’d call popular music the religion of cool. It can tell people how to feel cool, how to act cool, and generally what life is like in the world of cool. Much like actual religion, back in the early days, cool music came in only a few varieties: Rockabilly, Doo-Wop, Rock N’ Roll, and a handful of other styles. However, as the music progressed and fragmented, so did the idea of what cool was. Today the landscape is littered with musical genres, all vying for your attention. I’ve found the best way to go is to sample a little of everything, and take what you like, depending on what you’re in the mood for.  Try a little old school hip-hop, or garage band punk.  Pick up a CD from a low-key acoustic guitarist or piano rocker.  Support your local ska band.  Expand your horizons.

7. PICK UP A HOBBY

Another surefire way to improve your cool quotient is to start a new hobby, particularly one that involves groups (cool people socialize). Karate classes, guitar lessons, Ultimate Frisbee, painting, jogging, volunteering… pretty much anything you can do to pry yourself off the couch, and away from the Playstation will guarantee a rise in your cool quotient.

8. ABANDON THE TUBE, TO A POINT

Similarly, you could probably stand to watch a little less TV.  There are some exceptions though - if your whole office watches "Deadwood" or "Desperate Housewives", you kind of have to as well, or risk being left out of the best break room conversation.  In that case, you might want to check out VH1’s "Best Week Ever" or the E! Channel’s "Talk Soup"; both will let you know what happens on all the popular shows (and usually why you shouldn’t bother with them as well).

9. WEAR A JACKET

Colds aren’t cool.

10. FIND A NEW HANGOUT

It’s an infallible law; the coolest places in your town are always the hardest to find.  You probably don’t even know where they are… yet.  Pick up a free local paper; they usually have listings of where things are happening. Most major newspapers have weekend sections as well, many free on their websites. Speaking of the Net, if you happen to live in Indy, Chi-Town, Milwaukee, or Des Moines, you should definitely check out the After Hours section of this very magazine.

11. BE TOPICAL

cool people have opinions about things, and are able to speak their mind. If you want to sound like you know what you’re talking about, you need to stay informed. Tune in to current events. Know who’s playing in the Superbowl. Keep track of which pop singers have been caught lip-synching. Study history or literature. You don’t need to be an expert on any one subject, but being well versed in a variety of topics will help you socially, and make you more interesting and therefore cool. 

12. BE CONFIDENT

It’s become kind of a cliché, but confidence is everything in social situations. Whatever your notion of cool, whatever music and movies you buy or how you decorate your home, how you present yourself will ultimately define whether or not you are cool. If you live your life with confidence and conviction, cool will take care of itself.

Comments
What is spam?
Written by Guest on 2008-03-24 15:18:50
What is spam?
What is spam?
Written by Guest on 2008-03-24 15:19:28
What is spam?
What is spam?
Written by Guest on 2008-03-24 15:20:29




 
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What is spam?
Written by Guest on 2008-03-24 15:21:01
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What is spam?
Written by Guest on 2008-03-24 15:21:41
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:grin
Written by Guest on 2008-03-24 15:22:25
 
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:eek
Spam
Written by Guest on 2008-12-10 12:39:18
See above - THAT is Spam. ;)
Written by Guest on 2010-02-07 22:22:02
:zzz :roll

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