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I want to be a comedian Print E-mail
Contributed by Nick Powills   
Tuesday, 15 March 2005
You know what I hate? I hate it when you hold the door for someone and they have this annoying urge to put their hands on the door to hold it too. What kind of garbage is that? What, do you think I’m just going to let the door fall on you? Do you think I am going to get a mischievous grin on my face and slam it on you? NO. Just let me hold the damn door.

<Insert laughter>

What do you think? You think I got it?

Nah, I didn’t think so.

I would love to be a stand up comedian, but I know I am far away from that. I have plenty of stories, but as many of my friends won’t hesitate to tell you, my delivery sucks. For some reason, I usually find my stories much funnier than the person I’m telling the story to.

Maybe the solution is to steal other people’s experiences and turn them into my own. But, that’s kind of cheating.

Some people have it. Some people don’t. And those who do, I respect a ton.
Sure, comedy is a form of entertainment and some will tell you it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the motions, but it sure takes a rocket scientist to figure out how to be funny. You can’t read a book and instantly become funny. Trust me, I’ve tried it. So, again, those who have it are some of the more brilliant people in the world.

Heck, even George Bush has it to some extent. Maybe that’s why so many Americans love the guy. He can’t speak, and that makes oh so many people laugh.

And maybe that’s why he did so well after 9-11. He figured out that laughter is a great solution to depression.

Laughter and comedy can win an election.

And laughter and comedy are what makes the world go round.

That’s why I want to be funny. That’s why I want to be a comedian. That’s why I must get down this damn delivery.

Why did the bicycle fall over? Cause it was two tired.

<Insert laughter>

OK, maybe I will stick to the journalism.

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